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Phoebe's hospital birth story

Lola was due on 1/4/22. I went into Wollongong hospital to get monitored because of reduced fetal movement on the 28/3. Something didn’t feel right and I’m not really sure if it was because I was just nervous about the upcoming birth or something actually wasn’t right.  Lola didn’t move much for the few hours I was monitored and the ob suggested an induction, which I really didn’t want to get.

 

The midwife offered a stretch and sweep to see if we could get anything going and I had no idea what to do. I was stuck in this little shoebox of a room with no windows completely on my own and had to make a huge decision, of course, my family were just like 'get induced - what is the big deal?'. Cara (my doula) really helped me here and just said trust your instinct. I ended up opting to get induced because I know I wouldn’t have been able to stop worrying about it and be able to sleep... and something just felt off.

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They told me to come in the next day at 3 pm but said they would call first because of the availability of beds. The next day we waited around until 3 pm trying to relax and there was no call, ended up calling the hospital and they said to call back at 5 pm. At 5 pm they said to slowly make our way in so my boyfriend and I went and had dinner on the way. Got to the hospital around 6 pm and did some more waiting with Lola being monitored. At about 9 or 10 pm I had a balloon catheter inserted, my water immediately broke and I had no discomfort luckily, I didn’t even know until the doctor told me it had broken. They took the catheter out and transferred me to the natal ward to sleep. I had a terrible sleep of 2 hours because of the stretching that was happening but was so excited and nervous that I don’t think I would have been able to sleep anyway.

At 8 am I was induced, Nath and Cara were both helping me through my labour. Lola was on my back and it was super painful but I had breaks in between the contractions. I tried the tens machine which helped and also the gas, but that made me vomit. I was in the shower most of the time with a showerhead on my belly and back. So thankful I had Cara there to give me water and talk to the midwife whilst Nath stayed by my side in the shower. 

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I’m not sure what time it was but I asked for an epidural, and the midwife was a bit reluctant because I wasn’t dilated enough. I left the shower and had a cervix examination on the bed, midwife still advised me against it. The midwife left and came back and said I was allowed because I hadn’t had much sleep.

I was really nervous about getting the epidural but the female anaesthetist made me feel so comfortable, she was great. Right before I received the epidural my contractions became so much more intense, I was pretty quiet up until this point but now I was wailing and in so much pain. After I had the epidural, my midwife said I could have a nap now and Nath went off to have some lunch. I was still feeling the pressure but there was no pain.

After about 15 to 20 minutes I felt like I needed to push. The midwife said no no just relax. I was clenching my legs together so hard, I felt like the baby was coming. The midwife checked me and said Lola was ready to come and went to call the ob. I freaked out a little bit because Nathan was not there so Cara called and luckily he was on his way back. Within a few minutes, my legs were up in stirrups, the room was full of people and I was being told to push, I actually found pushing really hard and I wish I focused a bit more on that during my pregnancy.

I’m not really sure how long I pushed for, it felt like 45 minutes but I don’t know... could have been longer. Lola was born at 3.17 pm on the 30th of March, with some help from the vacuum. She tore a bit of my labia as she came out with her hand up next to her head. 

Everyone left the room and Nath and I had some time together with Lola as she had her first breastfeed. I feel pretty lucky with my birth experience. I would have preferred not to be induced but I have Lola and there were no problems so it doesn’t really matter in the end.

I remember I used to see pregnant women when I was younger and just think “aren’t they terrified, birth seems so painful!” But as soon as I found out about doulas and in turn, found Cara… I relaxed and was so confident in myself and my body and actually looked forward to giving birth. I had a great support team and Cara just completed that circle for me, Nath and I couldn't have done it without her. 

 

 

 

Phoebe and Nathan's one piece of advice for mothers and partners about to birth:

Nath: try to have structure but be prepared to learn new things and change it up every day, it’s an ongoing experiment.

Phoebe: keep the postpartum period as quiet as possible to just relax/heal and be with your new little family. I also second the experiment comment - every baby is different! Never compare to other babies or mums! 

What is one thing your birth/becoming a mother has taught you?

I worried a lot about my breasts and body changing.. and when it did, it came as a huge shock. The look and feel of my body as it grew and as it continues to nourish Lola and change postpartum is something that I continue to navigate. Through this experience though, Lola has put this shift into perspective for me, as she truly doesn't care what I look like, which is so special and so unconditional. Through becoming her mum, my relationship with my own body has shifted and evolved, which is really special.

In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge the Traditional Custodians of Country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their Elders' past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today. I would like to acknowledge the Traditional Custodians of the Dharawal and Yuin Lands, on which we work.

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